Readings
Numbers 12:1 – 13
Matthew 14:22 – 36
Reflection
Because of a profound religious experience I had when I was in grade 11, I began to take my faith seriously. I remember going back to school and telling my classmates that all the things we’d been taught in religion classes were true, but the world hadn’t changed for them. This caused me to doubt my experience, so I asked my parents, “What do you do if you have doubts?” Not being theologians, they gave me the standard Catholic answer of their time. They told me that if I had doubts, I should force them out of my mind because it was the devil trying to tempt me. I thought, “Great! Now I haven’t just got doubts, but the devil is trying to get me!” That was a great help! So a few nights later, I was sitting up in bed, trying to force the doubts out of my mind, but the problem was they kept coming back. In desperation, I prayed, “Lord, help me.” I grabbed the bible on my bedside table and it opened on the story of Jesus walking on the water. Peter calls out from the boat, “Lord, if it really is you, tell me to come to you.” Jesus says, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and went to Jesus. But then he realised what he was doing and began to doubt and sink, and like me he cried out, “Lord help me,” and Jesus grabs his hand and said, “man of little faith, why did you doubt?” Those words jumped out of the page at me, and I realised, “Hey! He talks back!” From that moment on I understood that what we read of the Holy Spirit in the New Testament is true – guidance is offered to us. This has never left me, and this Gospel story was the way God spoke to me and revealed Himself to me in my doubt.
Fr. Ray Sanchez CP is the leader of the Oxley community and is responsible for Parish Missions and Retreats throughout Australia and NZ.